Letter to ‘Personal Problems’ Advice Column.
Dear Zelda,
I am a Royal Marine currently based in Plymouth. My parents live in the London suburbs at Sidcup, and one of my sisters, who lives in Colchester, is married to a member of the Parachute Regiment. My parents have recently been arrested for growing and selling cannabis and are currently dependent on my two other sisters, who are prostitutes at Kings Cross. I used to have two brothers. One is serving a prison sentence for the rape and murder of a teenage boy. The other brother has recently committed suicide after he was charged with incest.
I have recently become engaged to a former pro who lived in Clapham, and indeed, is still a part time working girl. However her time in this oldest of professions is limited due to an infection of recurring herpes. We intend to marry as soon as possible and we are currently looking into the possibility of opening our own brothel, with my fiancée utilising her knowledge of the industry working as the manager. I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our team and although I would prefer them not to prostitute themselves, it would at least get them off the street and, hopefully the heroin.
But I digress, my problem is this. I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family and of course I want to be totally honest with her. Should I therefore tell her about my brother-in-law being a Para?
Yours most sincerely 'Royal'
tut