Scottish Elises

Worthy of Murray.

"Massa spent most of the weekend in bed with a box of Kleenex"

tut

ps very appropriate Avatar for tomorrow.........

tut

Here are some other howlers

1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Claire Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '


10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.'

Germany v England at the football in the mid 90.


"kuntz was caught out by the rush of seamen"

So, did they pay Toyota to short fuel Trulli (Mr Rolling Road Block)? Seems a reasonable conspiracy theory

Or is the plan that Raikonnen takes Hamilton out at the first corner?

Either Ferrari did an excellent job sand bagging or they really have short fuelled both cars ... could work against them if it rains and there is a safety car ... but then again, they couldn't afford not being on the front row - first and foremost, Massa must win the race for him to have a chance.

My money is on a draw (in which case Massa wins on having more 2nd places) and it all comes down to that 1 point Massa clawed back when Bourdais was penalised for driving on the race track

The dynamic duo mentioned Lewis's unexplained 32 second gearbox outage from last year's clincher ... they were all shushy about it as though somehow Ferrari had a remote control switch to turn off his gearbox ... thinking about it, perhaps that is what happened Same could happen tomorrow - turn it off for just long enough to slip him into 6th place!

Any more outlandish conspiracy theories out there?

Cheers,
Robin

How about that Heiki's car was "turned down" from the pits just enough to make sure he didn't nudge Hamilton down another spot.

Flash at red lights in Edinburgh and they turn green.

"The dynamic duo mentioned Lewis's unexplained 32 second gearbox outage from last year's clincher ... they were all shushy about it as though somehow Ferrari had a remote control switch to turn off his gearbox ... thinking about it, perhaps that is what happened Same could happen tomorrow - turn it off for just long enough to slip him into 6th place!"

That was exactly my thought Robin. The way they said it smiling to each other, then Blundell said it was something that would never happen again, in a very devious way.

tut

Flash at red lights in Edinburgh and get arrested?

Was actually impressed by Hamilton's pre race interview 30 mins ago.

He is still a boy, but handled all the questions re being taken out, disliked etc well, so I hope it is decided on ability and not on jealousy.

50% chance of rain could make it interesting. Bring on BBC and get rid of these effing adverts.

tut

Not long to go now, getting nervous, I have a horrible feeling about the first corner....

kenny wrote:I have a horrible feeling about the first corner....

ohh now raining!

Two mins to go and it has started raining.

Delayed start for tyres.

tut

Rain off and sun out, tough call on tyres.